Lifestyle

'Hiya!' and five other unbearable ways to greet someone

SEEN an old friend in the street? Spotted your cousin at the bus stop? Here’s six ways to alienate them from the get-go.

'3am in the morning' and other turns of phrase that make you clench your fists

EVER get the red mist just because someone – perhaps even someone you love – has used a phrase that seems a legitimate reason to kill? Like these?

Women commit to rewilding 75 per cent of their leg hair

THE women of the UK have pledged to restore the natural ecosystem of their legs this winter.

Five items you already regret buying on Amazon Prime Day

BRITONS have eagerly been buying unnecessary tat in the Amazon Prime sale. But which useless purchases are you going to regret most when you can’t afford food in a week's time? 

Man's day ruined after petrol pump shows £50.01

A MAN will be in a foul mood for the rest of the day after his slow trigger finger left him paying for £50.01 of petrol.

Woke eco-warrior has secret Amazon Prime account

A WOMAN who exhorts everyone to shop locally, live sustainably and put the planet first has a secret Amazon Prime account.

Daily alcohol limits not really working for us, say drinkers 

RECOMMENDED daily limits on alcohol are really not doing it for us, drinkers have confirmed.

Gender party reveals foetus as 'boy' and parents as 'twats'

A GENDER reveal party has confirmed the sex of a baby and the utter twattishness of his parents, friends and family have confirmed.  

The Flat Earth Society's guide to going on holiday

IF there is one thing we can all agree on in these uncertain times, it’s that the Earth is a big flat circle. Here’s how to enjoy a holiday on our massive floating disc.

Giving an erotic massage and other activities you'll regret 30 seconds after starting

MANY things in life seem like a brilliant idea to begin with before almost immediately becoming tedious, painful and irritating. Here are some to avoid.