Society

A MAN who asked his son’s girlfriend if she was going to stay for ‘Netflix and chill’ with the family has made everyone present want to curl up and die.

PARENTS only have a third baby in case the first two turn out to be dicks, it has been confirmed.

AN A-Level student has claimed his coursework has been hacked by Russians and turned into a paltry mess of ill thought out ideas.

THE new Royal baby born on St George’s Day will be possessed with the spirit of King Arthur and is fated to save England, unless it turns out to be a girl.

A MAN’S bank that was incredibly welcoming and friendly has suddenly turned nasty over the relatively trivial matter of a £15,000 loan.  

A MIDDLE-CLASS man cannot prevent himself putting on a strange working-class accent when he meets people who do physical work.  

IT is a bad idea to put evidence of crimes, cheating the system and extramarital affairs on Facebook, morons have been advised.  

A NEW study has revealed that ‘mate’ is often used as verbal camouflage by people who think the person they are addressing is a twat or worse.

TEACHERS at a primary school are sad to see yet another middle-class child who has been given a ridiculous name.  

NO ONE can avoid getting older, but you can pretend to be 25 when you’re in your mid-40s and beyond. So which desperate, embarrassing measures are you opting for?