Society

A TEN year old boy doesn't know what he did to deserve being punished with a day out to a really old fucking town in the middle of nowhere.

AN ABSOLUTE psychopath has confirmed he puts his socks on before his pants.

A 64-YEAR-OLD drinking her way through retirement has informed millennials that the reason they are not doing better is because of their poor social skills.

AN EX-LONDON couple are very excited after a brief exchange with working class locals in their new area.

NURSES will get a six per cent pay rise on the condition that they also do the job of the Fire Service, the government has announced.

MARK Zuckerberg has closed down Facebook and opened a creepy little shop that has exactly what you most desire.

A DAD has helpfully given his son all the wrong answers to his homework.

SELF-RIGHTEOUS Facebook refusers are really loving this current data hoo-ha, it has been confirmed.

A DOG allowed into a trendy coffee shop would much rather be in a carpeted pub listening to workmen’s dirty anecdotes, it has emerged.  

A FATHER-TO-BE is choosing a baby buggy as if he is planning to take it on a six-day endurance marathon through the Cairngorms.