Society

A POTHOLE is ‘100 percent certain’ an increase in council tax will have no effect on it whatsoever.

WOMEN are finally able to eat crisps with their delicate lady mouths thanks to the launch of a female-friendly version of the popular snack.

A MAN outraged about potentially having a comment misconstrued is in no danger of it ever happening.

A COUPLE are celebrating with prosecco in bed now that their child can fend for himself until midday, they have confirmed.

BABIES who have been perfectly happy all day, turn into utter shits between 4pm and 6pm, it has been confirmed.

A WOMAN who ‘really doesn’t want to get involved’ in someone else’s argument has managed to find a way of doing so.

AN IDIOT has set out his theory of why hen parties are just as sexist as the World Darts Championship.

A WOMAN'S mother-in-law is basically a Nazi on speed until the babysitter cancels and a quick replacement is needed, it has been confirmed.

The 'funniest' one in a group of friends is actually just being much louder than everyone else, it has been confirmed.

LOCAL cafes in the North of England are competing over who has the most revolting sounding breakfast.