Society

CATS have once again utterly failed to keep their resolutions to change their ways in the new year.

A GROUP of apricots has pledged to remain hard and sour for all eternity.

EXCITED Britons are deciding how they will spend the extra second of ‘leap’ time in 2015.

HUMANITY’S ability to laugh at itself is its best hope for survival, according to experts.

MOST relationships with an age gap fail because of differing children's television references, it has emerged.

THE record numbers of people now trapped in the capital believe they have little chance of returning to freedom.

LONDON’S Shard building has grown two new floors without anyone having worked on it.

MILLIONS of unwanted presents are being listed online to commemorate Jesus’s parents flogging their gifts from the wise men.

THE current year has been abandoned as a waste of everyone's time after just five days.

THE announcement of increased train ticket prices has caused millions to use the strongest possible expletive.