Work

Office great place to compensate for being unpopular at school, boss believes

A MANAGER feels his office is the ideal environment to make up for being bullied and a failure at school, he has confirmed.

How to boss people around by just wearing really expensive clothes

YOU could save hundreds of hours learning management skills by just dressing like an ostentatious arse.

Fantastic co-worker uses ‘amazeballs’ and ‘interweb’ in same sentence

A MIDDLE manager who says 'interweb' instead of 'internet' is a joy to work with, it has been confirmed.

Six ways to be the most middle-class person in your office

YOU’RE working a white-collar office job so you’re middle class, but are you the most middle-class person in your office?

Job candidates to be told how many twats work at the company

BEFORE  they commit to a job prospective employees will be told how many twats work in the office.

Everyone in office can tell man got laid at weekend

AN entire office is painfully aware that one of their colleagues got it at the weekend, it has been confirmed.

Man welcomes feedback as long as it's excellent

A MAN has confirmed that he welcomes feedback as long as it is always brilliant.

Boss demands complete professionalism from everyone except himself

A MANAGER who requires staff to be completely professional sees no contradiction in buggering off to take his car to the garage, it has emerged.

Woman who pulled sickie spends glorious day indoors feeling guilty

A WOMAN who called in sick to work because she ‘deserved some time for herself’ has spent her day hiding behind drawn curtains like a fugitive.

Everyone in office talking about cake, thinking about cake or eating cake

EVERY member of staff in an office appears to be dangerously obsessed with cakes, a new employee has claimed.