Politics

THE UK has ordered Theresa May to remain in position for a few weeks so it can relish her humiliation.

EVERYONE on your social media accounts agrees that it will be a Tory landslide or a shock Labour victory, depending on who you are. 

THOUSANDS of Briton are deciding whether or not democracy is worth getting rained on.

THERESA May has explained to Britain that she is not the bad guy in this election because she is wearing white.

A COUPLE are staying up all night to witness the live televised death of their fleeting interest in politics.

THE UK is on its way to the polling station to make a decision it is certain it will regret.

BORIS Johnson has finally chewed through the masking tape that has sealed his mouth in the run-up to the election.

A VOTER is unable to bring himself to look at them, any of them, when they appear on the news.

BELLENDS across the UK have been urged to not use their vote.

A CONSERVATIVE voter has annoyed everyone by not being as evil as they had hoped.