Politics

THE Conservatives have chosen a statue of the Duke of Wellington riding a horse as their candidate for Mayor of London.

JEREMY Corbyn has celebrated his first two weeks of not being assassinated by the British establishment.

THE UKIP conference has voted to campaign for staying in Europe after all.

THE MAN who will one day be Britain's prime minister has smoked cannabis for the first and only time.

DAVID Cameron took part in 'dirty' rituals involving the brain and mouth of a live billionaire, it has emerged.

LABOUR spin doctors are puzzled as to how they can possibly use the pig sex thing to make David Cameron look bad.

“My name is not important. Let’s just say that I want to help you. Do you have dreams David?”

RESPONDING to allegations about oral sex with a dead pig would be 'undignified', according to a man who once had oral sex with a dead pig.

THE nation is not remotely surprised to hear that its leader shoved his penis into the mouth of a dead pig.

SCOTLAND is today celebrating one year since absolutely nothing happened and everything stayed exactly the same.