Alcohol
Couple buy extra booze 'in case they’re snowed in'
A COUPLE have added extra alcohol to their shopping trolley in case they are trapped in the house by heavy snow.
Once-a-year drinkers to be mentored by seasoned piss artists
CHRISTMAS drinkers struggling to handle their alcohol intake are to be mentored by proper booze hounds.
Man who gets pissed after two pints still claiming he’s ‘allergic’
A MAN who is hammered after two pints still claims it is a ‘medical problem’, friends have confirmed.
Scots buying cheap booze from England admit they’ll have drunk it all before they get home
BOOZE cruises from Scotland to England will fail because none of the alcohol will make it home, Scots have admitted.
Colleague with ‘Friday feeling’ advised everyone gets hammered on Thursdays now
AN office worker excited about her Friday bottle of wine has been tactfully informed that everyone else already got wrecked the day before.
Alcohol to be restricted to nice people with degrees
ALCOHOL should only be available to nice people who know which wine goes best with fish, according to MPs.