Food

JACOB Rees-Mogg has informed his wife and six children that shortages mean their Christmas feast will be a mere 12-bird roast instead of the usual 17.

A WOMAN who eats complete shit all the time is baffled as to why her skin is in such a state.

FEEL like treating yourself this lunchtime? Reckon you’ll give that new place a go? Don’t waste your time because no gourmet meal can beat a sausage roll.

HOW better to rehabilitate vile disgusting stuff than giving it a lovely wholesome name? Here’s five examples that should be put to sleep.

BLUEBERRIES, the small posh fruit that claims to be an antioxidant superfood, have huge egos and a superiority complex, scientists have agreed.

IN DECADES past, loving parents dished up these foodstuffs to their children and somehow they survived. You’d never give this shit to your own kids.

ONCE upon a time, pepper was pepper. Then gastropubs got their hands on it and now it’s cracked black pepper. Here's some other things they've buggered up.

THE government has conceded that Domino’s drivers are key workers and should be given priority access to fuel.

THE journey from Britain’s farms to the food on your plate is vital to keeping the country going. Here’s how it’s broken down irrevocably.

A COUPLE cannot tell if the pleasure of a friend's company outweighs the hassle of accommodating his allergies.