Relationships

Woman takes any compliment as an insult

A WOMAN has the amazing ability to take any compliment given her and instantly turn it into an insult, her partner has confirmed.

Woman who stalks exes on Facebook 'just keeping in touch'

A WOMAN who regularly stalks her exes on Facebook has insisted she is 'just keeping in touch'. 

Woman having affair so she doesn't waste her suntan

A 32-YEAR-OLD woman has embarked on an affair in order not to waste her suntan.

Six perfect times to send a dick pic

ONCE men courted ladies with flowers, but today’s lovelorn troubadour sends a quick snap of his penis instead. But when is the perfect time?

Man marries woman he doesn't fancy to be polite

A BRITISH man has married a woman he is not attracted to out of sheer British politeness.

90 per cent of girlfriends' questions not intended to be answered

THE majority of questions asked by girlfriends are thinking out loud and should not be answered, boyfriends have confirmed.

'I was hoping you'd have a lightsaber,' says woman on arriving at date's flat

A WOMAN confirmed that she made the right choice of sexual partner when seeing a replica lightsaber mounted on the wall of his home.

Woman opts for celibacy rather than tidying her room

A WOMAN has decided never to have sex again rather than endure the horror of tidying her bedroom.

Boyfriend thinking of doing stand-up comedy instantly 85% less attractive

THE girlfriend of a man who believes he is funny enough to be a stand-up comedian is considering terminating the relationship immediately.

Best man's speech makes everyone realise groom is genuinely awful person

A BEST man speech has succeeded in turning everyone the groom has ever cared about against him.