Relationships

A WOMAN has introduced an annual performance review for her husband and children, noting that in most areas they are ranked as requiring urgent action for improvement.

A TEENAGE couple have marked their first month together by necking Strongbow in a playground.

FOOD we’ve got covered. Culture is rigidly stratified. But why are there no ways to make love that prove you’re better than the masses?

HAS your daughter brought her boyfriend home? Make sure you grill the f**ker with these questions. You’ll soon prove a toerag like him shouldn’t be anywhere near your special princess.

YOU’RE no prude and not even that old, but sex stuff nowadays can seem weird to anyone in their 40s. Here’s what you missed out on - and what the young 'uns are welcome to.

ALL of the social, economic, physical or psychological challenges you are facing are entirely the fault of your parents, new research has confirmed.

A WOMAN’S boyfriend has interrupted her complaint that nobody ever listens to her by explaining he is a great listener.

A MARRIED couple have made excuses to get out of date night after 20 minutes because there was no chemistry whatsoever.

A GROUP of men are regaling their mate’s new girlfriend with a detailed explanation of his most humiliating moments.

HUMPING away merrily then realise your child has wandered into the bedroom? Try and bail yourselves out with one of these implausible lies.