Society

A CROWDED train is the ideal place to unpack a massive picnic or sort out a business deal, idiots believe.

A MUM has baffled scientists by learning to tell a story in a clear and concise way.

A DRIVER is so brilliant at controlling a car he knows exactly how fast he can go without crashing or mowing people down.

A WOMAN going through a rough time cannot believe how quickly a friend hijacked the conversation and made it all about their own problems.

HAVE you ever wondered what it’s like being a permanently furious middle-aged white man? Here gammon Roy Hobbs describes a typical day.

A CRYPTIC Facebook post about 'fake people' has failed to achieve a single reaction, it has been revealed.

A MAN who waves at every car that is the same make and colour as his is still at large, authorities have warned.

A FATHER has pranked his son by saying he's proud of him, it has been confirmed.

THE end of the six-week summer holiday has seen peaceable, happy commuters turn back into a bunch of psychotic bastards again.

DRINKERS at a normal pub have been left shocked after a man brazenly ordered a hot drink.