Society

BERLIN will return thousands of hipsters when Britain fully departs the EU, it has emerged.

A MAN in a cafe has decided to share the sound of the internet videos he is watching, because he thinks everyone will probably like that.

A COUPLE who have enough money to make their house bigger should stop whining about the trauma it is causing them, it has been confirmed.

'COMING together' to make a success of Brexit is difficult if you believe it is a heap of shit, it has been claimed.

LONDON’s new ‘garden bridge’ will be grazed by herds of people living below the poverty threshold, it has been confirmed.

A WOMAN with a chaotic personal life and a history of believing in total nonsense is now being paid to give people advice, shocked friends have revealed.

A GROUP of over 80 men is jostling to help push a broken-down car.

FICTION-BASED books, films and television programmes have been banned to avoid confusing idiots.

A WOMAN who acts like a sophisticated occasional drinker only does it because alcohol turns her into a raging psychopath, it has emerged.

A WOMAN who managed to act normal during a 20-minute interview for a room in a shared house cannot wait to reveal how insane she is.