Society

A MAN who has benefited from constantly rising property prices somehow believes it is due to his excellent business skills.

A WOMAN’S clothes have entered their fifth day trapped in the washing machine with no escape in sight.

THE British class system has been broken down to two types of people, those who say ketchup and those who say red sauce, it has emerged.

A LOVING son spent an entire morning googling coupon codes to get money off a bunch of flowers for his mum, it has emerged.

A FATHER attempting to get his daughters into Catholic school told the admissions board that the Pope is 'fucking ace'.

ALL THE mothers at the school gate are horrendously competitive about their children’s progress, according to a mother who can think of nothing else.

A WOMAN is struggling to work out which of the unfamiliar smiling faces on her Facebook page she is supposed to recognise.

A LUCKY bastard of a schoolkid has got art this morning, then drama and then he's got history after lunch.

THE first class sections of regional trains do not feature the opulent luxury and fine dining experiences of the Orient Express, a man has found.

LONDON is today in the grip of normality, with millions having their breakfast then going to work.