Society

TRAGICALLY deluded men will be able to nurture their crush in a new Friend Zone cafe.

A MAN’S fight to end his gym membership continues despite an elaborate scheme to fake his own death.

A CHEF has claimed that when he has chips at home he eats them out of a tin mug, plant pot or miniature fry-basket.

A COUPLE’S garden is full of random objects including a stone frog playing a guitar and some sort of archway, it has emerged.

PEOPLE who moan are far less annoying than those who boast, it has been claimed.

A KNOW-IT-ALL who thought a ready meal would be so simple he wouldn't need instructions has had to fish the box out of the bin.

A MAN who will spend the entire summer mistaking the contemptuous stares of strangers for admiration has already got his diablo out, it has emerged.

A TODDLER threw a tantrum purely because he is a little bastard, it has emerged.

A MAN who wants to get back at everyone from school has surprised no-one by joining the police.

‘MILLENNIALS’ are the least fortunate generation in recent history apart from the ones who got conscripted, it has been claimed.