Society
People with no idea who Thatcher was 'ecstatic' that she's dead
THOUSANDS of people under 35 are rejoicing at the demise of a woman they once read about.
Northern Britain already hammered
EVERYONE in Britain north of Birmingham is already very drunk indeed.
New teen police commissioners to be at least 54
NEW youth police commissioners must be at least 54 and really into the first six albums by Yes.
Unprofitable families to be privatised
LOSS-MAKING families are to be sold off by the government.
Osborne: Let's end the stigma of disabled parking
GEORGE Osborne says parking in disabled people's spaces can boost their self-esteem.
Bullies demand fat kid clarification
BRITAIN’S thugs have asked whether jiggling a fat person is a hate crime.
Thick old people slam thick young people
THICKHEADED older people have criticised educational standards among young thickos.
Britain's welfare debate 'not working'
THE British system of debating social security is open to rampant abuse and exploitation, according to research.