Politics

THERESA May is set to stay for at least another year, so how will you survive more of her bullshit? Follow our guide to making it as painless as possible.

THE Brexit impasse has left the prime minister looking short of options, with her deal certain to be defeated whenever a vote is held. So where should she go from here?

JACOB Rees-Mogg has screamed for his nanny after soiling himself in the House of Commons.

A HISTORIAN has confirmed that Britain ends up in a raging mess whenever we make the mistake of putting posh people in charge.

A MAN who voted Leave ‘just to shake things up a bit’ has proclaimed himself delighted with events so far. 

TONIGHT’S confidence vote may trigger a leadership vote in the Commons followed by a vote of Conservative members then a referendum, say experts. 

THE prime minister has vowed to find the 'fucknut' who triggered Article 50 when it was perfectly obvious we needed more time.

JACOB Rees-Mogg has celebrated his 250th birthday in the remote country house where he was born in 1768.

BOOKMAKERS have confirmed that whoever the next Conservative leader is, it will be someone you hate even more than the present one. 

NOBODY can be arsed with Brexit except an angry upper class couple with multiple dogs, it has emerged.