Politics

THROUGHOUT history, evil men have led nations into war, slaughtered their own people and doomed generations to slavery. But could today’s advanced thick shake technology have stopped them?

BRAVE Slush Puppies are volunteering to be tossed at right-wing arseholes.

THEY’RE off! The starting gun has been fired, Theresa May’s long, slow demise is drawing to a close, and an absolute arsehole will succeed her. But which one?

LABOUR leader Jeremy Corbyn ruined a day out to Whitby for all the other pensioners by being an awkward sod, it has emerged.

A NEWS team visiting the Brexit heartland of Stoke-on-Trent is sick of interviewing people with reasonable, well-thought-out views.

HAVE your parents or grandparents become brainwashed followers of Nigel Farage? Cult deprogrammer Norman Steele explains how to stage an intervention.

A TEENAGER who believes politics needs a radical shake-up by his generation is less interested in the boring bits like actually voting.

POLITICIANS, the media and the UK public have admitted they cannot truthfully ever imagine Theresa May not being prime minister.

THE two main parties have lost hundreds of seats due to a backlash against Brexit, austerity, May, Corbyn, Parliament, the economy and everything fucking else.

ARE you a Brit who lives in the EU but still wants a no-deal Brexit? Here’s how to convince yourself it’s a perfectly sensible position.