Politics

MODERATE UK politicians are bewildered that the clueless, moronic, and bigoted general public, especially those in the godforsaken North, do not support them and their careers.

BREXITERS Boris Johnson and Jacob Rees-Mogg are still not helping to pick fruit despite being directly responsible for a chronic shortfall in seasonal farm workers.

THE bus used to claim that Brexit would save £350 million a week is caught in a 'self-destructive spiral of shame'.

HELLO, comrades. As a top politician I know only too well the importance of acting swiftly and decisively. Here’s how to take the bull by the horns in a variety of real-life situations.

A UNIVERSITY fresher is ready for Jeremy Corbyn to unleash his secret Brexit masterplan, it has emerged.

DOMINIC Raab has confirmed that he is stockpiling food and nobody else is having any of it. 

ANOTHER vote on leaving the EU should include questions designed to weed out total idiots, it has been claimed.

NIGEL Farage has been sitting on the edge of his bed in the dark crying and holding a signed photo of President Trump, according to friends.

DANNY Dyer has been appointed Minister for Not Getting Mugged Right off like a Right Little Mug, it has been confirmed.

BORIS Johnson and David Davis have confirmed that they quit the cabinet to go backpacking around South East Asia together.