Politics

JEREMY Corbyn has told friends that he really enjoyed his second leadership contest in 12 months and suggested they do one every year.

PROFESSIONS and organisations unpopular with the Conservatives must declare their income to foster greater envy and loathing.

DIANE James, the new leader of UKIP has named Halloween psychopath Michael Myers as her all-time favourite fictional hero.

DIANE James, the new leader of UKIP, has promised to come up with a reason for the party’s existence before 2017.

FORMER chancellor George Osborne believes he is the perfect choice to chair the Northern Powerhouse because he detests the South and its people.

JEREMY Corbyn and George Osborne are to share a constituency in a sitcom-style ‘odd couple’ scenario.

SAMANTHA Cameron is struggling to reassure her husband that he did a great job and everyone does not hate him.

SHADOW foreign secretary Emily Thornberry is not an asset to her pub quiz team, it has been claimed.

LABOUR leadership candidate Owen Smith used last night’s BBC hustings to repeat that while both candidates are shit, Jeremy Corbyn is also deranged.

THERESA May has confirmed that Michael Gove’s prison reform, education policies and canteen pass have all been cancelled with extreme prejudice.