Politics

NIGEL Farage has closely examined himself and decided his only flaw was a lack of facial hair.

JEREMY Corbyn has claimed that his left hand has been working to undermine him.

BRITONS are genuinely puzzled by what modern followers of Russian revolutionary Leon Trotsky do with their time.

DAVID Cameron cannot claim unemployment benefit for another five months because he quit his last job, it has emerged.

TWO adult humans have discussed grammar schools from opposing perspectives without either of them going off in a massive strop.

LABOUR leadership challenger Owen Smith stood on stage and said bad things about Jeremy Corbyn right to Jeremy’s face, shocked supporters have confirmed.

UKIP has announced unclear and contradictory plans for a night of drinking in a brewery.

BRITONS are worried that Labour leadership candidate Owen Smith might try to sell them life insurance or solar panels, they have revealed.

UKIP is to accelerate its leadership election to fill the bellend void left by Nigel Farage.

THERESA May has pledged to spend £350m a week negotiating Britain’s exit from the EU.