Alcohol

ARE you a semi-alcoholic who enjoys classy cocktail drinking but hasn’t bothered getting all the stuff in? Try these foul concoctions.

PROSECCO has told gin to enjoy its moment as Britain’s booze du jour while it can, because it will not last.

CHANGING a duvet cover is complicated, but can alcohol make it easier? Try with our step-by-step guide.

PARENTS are using playdates as an excuse to get smashed in the afternoons, they have confirmed.

EVERY single person on a 3.30pm train from Bath to Manchester is absolutely leathered, they have confirmed.

A MAN has startled colleagues by stating the exact amount of alcohol he intends to drink on a putative night out.

THIRTY years sailing through ice-crusted seas, knocking back potato vodka for breakfast toughens a man. But how would you fare in a drinking contest with this Russian trawlerman?

A WOMAN who has spent her adult life pretending that champagne is marvellous and special has finally admitted it tastes like farty urine.

A MICROBREWERY has been condemned by craft beer enthusiasts for brewing a beer widely popular for its pleasant taste.

EVERYONE who gets pissed on a couple of drinks is continuing to insist it was because they had not had a proper meal that day.