Food

IT'S dinnertime again and there’s not a single f**king thing in the fridge you want to eat. Here’s why.

A WOMAN has been found who has no specific dietary requirements, scientists have confirmed.

AN angry middle-aged man is under the impression food allergies are a voluntary choice made by snowflakes, it has emerged.

WHY did your grandparents make you eat fig rolls when Party Rings were available? Did they realise rationing had ended when they bought these?

HAVE you been disappointed by a meal out but lack the balls to complain? Here’s your guide to indirectly making your feelings known in a feeble British way. 

YOUR local chip shop is now offering customers the chance to pay for their fish supper in interest-free instalments, it has confirmed.

DO you have the tosspot-factor it takes to declare yourself a ‘foodie’? If so here’s how it will curse your enjoyment of eating.

FANCY eating out? Yearning for a stodgy feast? Avoid these 'pub classics' which no pub is capable of making.

LOVE chips but disapprove of deep-fat fryers? Try these other ways of cooking them that will leave you sad and disappointed.

SCIENTISTS have issued a warning that the planet is long overdue a ridiculous fad diet with no health benefits, it has emerged.