Six 'pub classics' pubs always f**k up

FANCY eating out? Yearning for a stodgy feast? Avoid these 'pub classics' which no pub is capable of making.

Air frying, and other chip-cooking techniques that are shit compared to a big vat of oil

LOVE chips but disapprove of deep-fat fryers? Try these other ways of cooking them that will leave you sad and disappointed.

World overdue a bullshit fad diet, scientists warn

SCIENTISTS have issued a warning that the planet is long overdue a ridiculous fad diet with no health benefits, it has emerged.

Britain remembers when it could afford disgrace of buying imported cheese

THE people of Britain are fondly reminiscing about the good old days when the country could afford the disgrace of importing two-thirds of its cheese.

Child interrogates parents after finding Maltesers wrapper in bin

THE discovery of a Maltesers wrapper in a kitchen bin has forced a six-year-old to interrogate her parents about its origins.

Five middle class school lunch box ideas your kid will chuck in a hedge

TRYING desperately to make your child eat baba ganoush when all they want is Monster Munch? Here are five lunches they’ll despise.

The worst snacks to sit next to on a train

YOU’VE boarded the train and are tackling the obstacle course of the aisle while looking for a seat. For Christ’s sake don’t sit down next to these types of snack.

Couple on small plates date night get KFC bucket on way home

A COUPLE who experienced a small plates meal at a trendy restaurant were forced to buy a f**k off massive KFC bucket on the way home.

'Peel here' and other food packaging lies

WE’RE all used to being lied to by friends and romantic partners, but it’s particularly upsetting when our trusted supermarket packaging does it. Here are some blatant lies they will expect you to swallow.

A winter without food is just what obese Britain needs. By The Daily Telegraph

THERE’S talk of a cost of living crisis. Of spiralling inflation. Of families being forced to choose between heating or eating. Well, as that great statesman Jacob Rees-Mogg would say, ‘Hallelujah!’