Everyone in restaurant hoping those two are father and daughter

ALL the diners in a restaurant are desperately hoping that couple are father and daughter.

Ex-boyfriends offering bad sex for Christmas

THE nation’s ex-boyfriends have texted offering a token gift and perfunctory, fumbled sex as a marvellous Christmas treat.

Couple having passive aggressive row by tagging each other on Facebook

A COUPLE are conducting a petty argument by tagging each other in Facebook posts.

Man who ridicules girlfriend's massive handbag still wants to put things in it

A MAN who moans that his girlfriend’s handbag is ridiculously large still asks her if he can put several items in it every time they go out.

Husband can't wait to hear latest thrilling twists and turns in saga of wife's office

A MAN cannot wait for his wife to update him on the latest gripping events in the ongoing saga of what’s happened in her office.

Wife lying in wait to ruin husband's anecdote

A WIFE who is very bored of hearing the same anecdote yet again is lying in wait to ruin it at just the right moment.

Smug couple hobbies that will make people hate you even more

DO your friends already hate you because of how sickeningly loved-up you are? Taking up one of these awful couples' hobbies will really ratchet up the nausea.

All men are twats, says woman exclusively attracted to twats

A WOMAN only ever romantically involved with utter dickheads believes, based on her own experience, that all men are utter dickheads.

Is your partner a pain in the arse to sleep with?

IF you wake up knackered and irritable most mornings it’s possible your partner is an annoying bastard to sleep with. Take our test and find out.

Man believes 'let's not get each other presents' means he doesn’t have to get his girlfriend a present

A MAN whose girlfriend suggested they do not buy each other presents this Christmas to save money has no idea he still has to get her something.