Relationships

'I'm a great listener,' man interrupts

A WOMAN’S boyfriend has interrupted her complaint that nobody ever listens to her by explaining he is a great listener.

Married couple bail on date night after 20 minutes because the chemistry isn't there

A MARRIED couple have made excuses to get out of date night after 20 minutes because there was no chemistry whatsoever.

Men treating mate's new girlfriend to run-through of his most shameful moments

A GROUP of men are regaling their mate’s new girlfriend with a detailed explanation of his most humiliating moments.

Why mummy was sitting on top of daddy shouting: What to do if you're caught in the act by your five-year-old

HUMPING away merrily then realise your child has wandered into the bedroom? Try and bail yourselves out with one of these implausible lies.

Straight man convinced he would be a catch if he were gay

A STRAIGHT man is confident that, if he were to have been gay, he would absolutely clean up.

23-year-old discovers mother was a real person once

A GROWN man has been left shaken after learning his mother is a complete person with a life that extends beyond him.

'Men can't have female friends' claims man who's never had one

A MAN who has never been able to befriend a woman assumes it is a universal rule applicable to the rest of humanity, it has emerged.

Woman who persuaded boyfriend to shave beard now has no choice but to dump him

A WOMAN who had never seen her boyfriend without a beard is regretting finding out he looked better with most of his face covered up.

Your guide to fancying your partner's best friend

ARE you stuck in a relationship with someone whose best friend is nicer, more attractive and the one you really fancy? Here’s what to do in this probably-doomed situation.

Good-looking bastard counts a fortnight as a dry spell

AN incredibly handsome man has the nerve to count two weeks without sexual intercourse as a ‘dry spell’, it has emerged.