Society

THE neighbours, friends, and family of a couple who are moving house to be in an area with better schools have been told to fuck off and not come back.

A SCHOOL trip to somewhere not even far away costs they-are-taking-the-fucking-piss, parents have confirmed.

INTERACTING with your teenage son or daughter’s partner is a complex challenge for dads. Here’s how to make it less of a total disaster.

A MAN on a tube train has established himself as a powerful and sexually successful individual by spreading his legs quite far apart.

A POMPOUS idiot is encouraging other people to adopt his horrendous punctuation, it has emerged.

THE neighbours of a well-spoken teenager have noticed his accent dramatically changes when his parents are not around.

IT’S traditional to be a bellend during your time at university, so here are the real essentials to take with you.

BRITONS are struggling to understand why good economic news keeps coming out but their personal finances are still up shit creek.

THE first university that is honest about being a bit shit has opened with a poorly-organised ceremony.

A MAN who got himself a dog to attract attention from women in the park is the last kind of person who should be looking after an animal, it has been confirmed.