Society

Woman who didn't have a lighter to lend stranger feels like a failure

A WOMAN who was asked for a light but did not have one now feels like an utter failure, she has confirmed.

Self-employed woman goes to weird pretend office with total strangers

A WOMAN who could work at home rents a desk in a building full of strangers instead, it has emerged.

Man reckons he is a good dancer

A MAN has decided he dances with both flair and skill.

Common people have baby

A COMMON couple are celebrating the birth of their third child.

Office bastards set air conditioning to ‘freezing’ for next six months

THE annual conflict over what temperature the air conditioning should be set at has begun in offices across Britain.  

What will be in Prince William’s best man speech?

Let’s face it, Prince William’s best man speech has pretty much written itself. Here are some likely extracts.

Man now desperate for Brexit news after day two of 'rich woman fires out quite large baby'

AFTER two days of 'posh woman has the baby', a man has realised he actually misses news about Brexit.

Dad blissfully unaware that ‘Netflix and chill’ means shagging

A MAN who asked his son’s girlfriend if she was going to stay for ‘Netflix and chill’ with the family has made everyone present want to curl up and die.

Parents only have third child in case first two are rubbish

PARENTS only have a third baby in case the first two turn out to be dicks, it has been confirmed.

'Russians hacked my course work,' claims A-Level student

AN A-Level student has claimed his coursework has been hacked by Russians and turned into a paltry mess of ill thought out ideas.