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Joaquin Phoenix's Joker really speaks to my sense of not having sex. By Martin Bishop

JOKER really spoke to young men like me. My generation faces economic uncertainty, the end of traditional gender roles, and the possibility of having to hollow out a melon to have something a bit like sex.

We ask you: how dangerously triggered are you by foreigners doing benefit fraud?

A BULGARIAN criminal gang has stolen a record £53.9 million with fake Universal Credit claims over four years. So how unfeasibly angry does it make you, and should you call an ambulance?

How to be shit at gossiping, by a man

DOES the minutiae of people’s personal lives somehow fail to grip you? It might be because you’re a man. Here Martin Bishop explains how to be useless at spreading tittle-tattle.

The middle-aged person's guide to losing friends

IS your life cluttered with friends you’d prefer didn’t exist? Or require a minor effort to occasionally meet? Learn how to lose them like a middle-aged pro.

'How do you spell cheugy?': The new piss-easy Gen Z version of Scrabble

THE makers of Scrabble have launched a new version which is ‘less competitive’ for Generation Z. This sounds like bollocks, so what can fans of the tiresome board game expect?

Man on first date confused as woman resembles photo

A MAN on his first date with someone he met on a dating app was left confused when he discovered she looked exactly like her profile photo.