News

Colleges offer Level 5 NVQ in changing a duvet cover

COLLEGES keen to equip students with key life skills are introducing a National Vocational Qualification in putting a cover on a duvet.

Mum blows entire life savings at school fete

A MOTHER-of-two has spent every single penny she had in a single afternoon at the school’s summer fete.

Women do walk of shame to hen night

A GROUP of women have been spotted doing the 11am walk of shame to their city-centre hotel for a hen night.

How Madonna will out-weird Eurovision

EVERY year, Brits gather at the home of their gayest friend to laugh at Eurovision and end up being totally weirded out by what Latvia considers pop music.

Five ways to join in the leg-washing 'debate' even though it's idiotic

MANY people have admitted they don’t wash their legs in the shower, sparking a furious Twitter ‘debate’. Here are some handy comments to help you join in.

Maniac eats chocolate at bottom of Cornetto first

A MAN always eats the bit of chocolate at the bottom of a Cornetto first instead of saving it until the end like a normal person.

How much more of a twat can Morrissey be?

MORRISSEY has once again depressed everyone by wearing an anti-Muslim ‘For Britain’ badge. But can the former Smiths singer become a bigger knobhead?

Pensioner thinks having a job once means he should get everything free

A PENSIONER who worked all his life like most people in the UK somehow believes it entitles him to getting everything for free.

Woman finds men don't like constructive criticism of dick pics

A WOMAN who receives unsolicited pictures of penises has discovered that the men who send them do not seem to appreciate her feedback.

Awful middle class child looking for second treehouse as an investment

A MIDDLE class child is on the lookout for a second treehouse in order to make a killing on the property market.

Millennial resigns herself to having 'plant babies'

A WOMAN who cannot afford to buy a house and fill it with children has decided to become the 'mum' of her houseplants instead.

Twat looking for new series he can feel superior about not watching

AS Game Of Thrones concludes, a man is seeking out another TV show he can ostentatiously make a point of not watching.