News

A SCHOOLBOY who asked for divine intervention to get out of his GCSEs is in terrified awe of the trouble he has created.

A FRUIT machine in a Hull pub never wanted to end up like this, it has admitted.

MEGHAN Markle will show her commitment to Britain by carrying around an inflatable penis on her hen night.  

IT is quite simple, there is a list of gits and you vote for one.

POLICE are exploring the possibility that Lord Lucan, who disappeared in 1974 following the murder of his children’s nanny, may simply be on an extended gap year.

JAMES Murdoch has caused the very nature of veracity to collapse in on itself after giving evidence to MPs.

POLICE are threatening an immediate halt to all Brazilian face-shootings as part of their ongoing pay row with the government.

THE MI6 assassin who killed Diana, Princess of Wales did not seem intent on murder just hours before her fatal crash, her inquest has been told. 

SUSPECTED canoeist John Darwin appeared before magistrates this morning charged with three counts of being a complete arse.