News

'Can I get back to you on that?' and other ways to respond when someone says 'I love you'

SOMEONE dropped the L-bomb out of the blue? Stuck for a response? Check out these half-dozen ways to let them down easy (for you).

Boyfriend does 12-item supermarket shop and gets them all wrong

A MAN has returned from the supermarket with all 12 items that his girlfriend requested, each of them wrong.

Five types of story that give Daily Mail readers the raging horn

OUTRAGED? Livid? That’s the only way you can get blood flowing to your genitalia any more? Daily Mail reader Bill McKay divulges the genres of story that give him life.

Man comes to disturbing realisation that he enjoys running

A MAN is afraid of what he might become after going out on a run and enjoying it.

'Caribbean' and other things Americans can't stop mispronouncing

AMERICANS have made more television than anyone else, and we’ve got nothing else to do but watch it. But why do they say these words f**k all like they’re meant to?

pint of beer

How to bring the ambience of your dodgy local pub to your living room

MISSING your local bar during lockdown? Here are five ways to recreate the uniquely unpleasant atmosphere of your beloved watering hole at home.

How to earn £12.43 on eBay for 40 hours work

FANCY earning a bit of cash on the side by flogging some of your old stuff on eBay? Here's how to give yourself an incredibly badly paid full-time job.

'Epic fail' and five other phrases that are past their sell-by date

KEEPING up with the linguistic pace online is a minefield. If you want to look like you're up to date with the latest tedious phrases, make sure you avoid these.

Romantic meal ruined by annoying life-partner

A WOMAN'S romantic evening meal has been ruined by the presence of her prick of a boyfriend.

Brexiter can't get over how disastrous Megxit is

AN ardent Brexiter is appalled by what an absolute disaster Megxit has turned out to be.

'Bubble' far too jolly a term, nation confirms

BRITONS have decided that ‘bubble’ is too cosy a term for a grim huddle of bored people stuck indoors with only each other for company.

Five shows you don't need to watch the middle of

PUSHED for time? Bored of all the padding in a typical hour-long show? Here are five you can safely fast-forward through the middle 40 minutes of.