the dailymash

Distant galaxies never look like cock and balls

A confused millennial tries to… aura farm his way through a job interview

DUE to the vagaries of late-stage capitalism – I believe in giving back, so I subscribe to eight OnlyFans – I needed a job. WFH of course, I’m not a freak.

The strict rules all GPs must follow before they prescribe Mounjaro

WEIGHT-loss jab Mounjaro is now available from the NHS, but will your GP prescribe it? Only if you meet these strict criteria.

Friend who doesn't follow the news might be onto something

YOUR friend who you have previously mocked for their lack of interest in current affairs may have had the right idea the entire time, you have admitted.

Trump: 'Like my tariffs, this cannot backfire in any way'

PRESIDENT Trump has confirmed that, like his imposition of tariffs on the entire world, airstrikes on Iran cannot possibly have any negative consequences.

'Why I don't care how many women I have to shag to meet The One'

I AM on a journey which is also a quest. And I’m on Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge. Because it does not matter how many women it takes; I will find my soulmate.

How to care for a friend's Northerner while they're away

A FRIEND is in the Algarve, and you’ve been entrusted with the care of their Northerner. Here’s how to ensure he remains healthily gruff and bitter-supping.

Your astrological week ahead for June 21st, with Psychic Bob

Apparently there’s a shot of the Sycamore Gap tree in the new 28 Years Later. But a fast-moving zombie one.