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Why nobody must be punished for the Post Office scandal, by anyone in any kind of power

THERE is loose talk of penance. Of ‘having to pay’. But as a person who has done well in life, I believe we cannot punish anyone involved in the Post Office scandal.

How to stay annoyed during a heatwave

DURING heatwaves it’s important to take appropriate precautions during a heatwave so that you stay British and irritable, not relaxed like a foreigner. Remain peeved with this guide.

Have you seen the twats on these f**king juries, says senior judge

A SENIOR judge has invited the public to look at the cretins and halfwits on the average jury and ask if they would like to be judged by them.

Couple accepts they will never have sex adventurous enough to need a safeword

A COUPLE have agreed they are not really the type to have sex dangerous or boundary-crossing enough to need a safeword, and feel the lesser for it.

'How did he find the time?': Inappropriate questions you want Gregg Wallace to answer

LEERING cockney Gregg Wallace has been sacked after a round 50 allegations of inappropriate behaviour. But leaving key questions unanswered...