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Sarkozy Cuts Lunch Breaks To Eight Hours
FRENCH president-in-waiting Nicolas Sarkozy yesterday unveiled his radical plans for a social revolution in France including a cut in the lunch break from nine to eight hours.
Scotland Marks Start Of National Drinking Season
NATIONAL Drinking Season kicked-off in spectacular fashion over the bank holiday weekend with more than 125,000 arrests and pandemonium across the country.
Salmond Offers To Buy Nicol Stephen A Pony
ALEX Salmond has extended the hand of friendship to Lib Dem leader Nicol Stephen by offering to buy him a beautiful pony named 'Brambles'.
Mcconnell Barricades Himself Inside Bute House
FIRST Minister Jack McConnell has barricaded himself inside his official residence and is refusing to leave.
Mr Salmond's 'Independent Contraption' Will Never Burrow To The Centre Of The Earth
April 26, 1897, Edinburgh
Sirs,
It is with the utmost urgency that I write to you, my fellows of the Royal Society of Scotland, to alert you to the danger posed by Mr A Salmond and his proposal to build a steam driven contraption with the intention of burrowing to the centre of the Earth.
One Woman's Week: Cruel To Be Kind
BY KAREN FENESSEY
I've got no tolerance for children who answer back to adults. I'm a teacher, so I've got a lot of experience of this, and as far as I am concerned they can burn in hell.
Scotland Branded 'Idiot State' By Un Election Observers
UNITED Nations election observers last night labeled Scotland as one of the most knuckle-headed countries on the face of the earth.
Brown 'Beats Crap' Out Of Mcconnell On Eve Of Poll
TENSIONS inside the Labour campaign boiled over last night as Gordon Brown delivered a severe thumping to First Minister Jack McConnell.