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Wonka Factory 'Full Of Rats'
WILLY WONKA has been fined £75,000 after rats were discovered inside his magical chocolate factory.
Controlled Explosions Linked To Insurance Scam
DOZENS of cars blown-up across the UK in the wake of the failed terror attacks are part of an elaborate insurance scam, the Daily Mash has learned.
Macaskill Brings Mini Poppadoms To 'Cobra' Meeting
MILLIONS of Scots slept easier in their beds last night as justice secretary Kenny MacAskill took full control of the nation's security.
Guest Blog: Ricky Gervais
I'M sitting, right, in The Chateaux Marmont Hotel (which is only the place where late comedy genius John Belushi snuffed it!) thinking, should I call room service and have another one of those lovely smoothie drinks, or shall I ring my good friend Ben Stiller for a chat about this really mental script he personally sent over to me, yesterday?
Airport Attackers To Be Charged Under Anti-Smoking Laws
TWO men who drove a lit car into the main concourse at Glasgow Airport are to be charged under Scotland's tough anti-smoking laws.
Threat level raised to 'Underpants'
THE terrorist threat level across the UK has been raised from 'spacehopper' to 'underpants', the Home Secretary confirmed last night.
