THE funeral of the Duke of Edinburgh today is a sombre occasion which William and Harry cannot be allowed to ruin by pinching. Here’s how it will be avoided.
THE vast majority of conversations in London focus solely on comparing the merits of various milk substitutes, a new study has found.
DO you think attending school Monday to Friday is enough education for your child? This is sleepwalking into disaster. Here are five dire consequences of not getting them extra tutoring.
Annoyed that a royal funeral has steamrollered the BBC’s Saturday afternoon schedule? These are the shit programmes you were never going to tune in for anyway.
A WOMAN cannot be bothered to sit in the cold outside a restaurant now that restrictions have lifted if the only person eating with her is her boyfriend.
RAISING children can be a fun, rewarding experience, except when they're pestering you to buy them wildly unsuitable stuff. Here are five requests that get a hard 'no'.
YOUR father-in-law has arrived at your house and for some reason has brought his drill.
WHILE everybody would like to think they have luck on their side, there are some absolutely ludicrous superstitions out there that need to be questioned. Here are a few of them.
SOME members of the public take any solemn event as an opportunity to throw good taste out of the window. If you’re doing any of these things to remember Prince Philip, reconsider.
CAN’T keep up with the huge number of government scandals? Don’t worry, here are today’s acts of parliamentary misconduct that the Tories won’t be accountable for.
WITH major TV shows returning to our screens, be sure to ruin them for everyone else using social media. Here are some highly annoying habits.
WITH the likes of Piers Corbyn, Laurence Fox and Shaun Bailey wanting to be mayor, are there other candidates of a similarly low calibre who could run our capital’s affairs?
ALWAYS whinging? Unable to understand basic concepts like ‘bedtime’ and ‘rain’? You might be a toddler. Take our quiz to find out.
FATHERS across the country have seen the custom-made Land Rover hearse for Prince Philip’s funeral and begun planning their own.
ONLY a self-centred idiot would make a funeral all about them. Here Prince Andrew explains why he should be the centre of attention as the nation mourns.
BEING a bloke comes with a hideous array of unreasonable expectations. Consider yourself a failure as a man if you fall foul of any of the following:
A WOMAN who has just joined 25 million Britons in having her Covid vaccine is mortified she forgot to share her special news on social media.
SOME UK universities have relaxed their standards on spelling and grammar. Here pompous old git Norman Steele debates the issue with young, trendy wanker Josh Hudson.
HAVE you ever wondered what sort of twat has the time and inclination to abuse strangers online all day? Here leading troll Martin Bishop explains his craft.
HAVE you inadvertently brought your child up to be a total nightmare? Here’s how to absolve yourself from blame by saying it’s all the fault of their teacher.